Candidate Questions 2018
Portsmouth City Councilor Candidate, Josh Denton, answers the Tug’s Tough Questions.
Q: Do you like the Tug? And what is your understanding of how website hosting works?
A:I legitimately loved having random people at State Street ask me who I thought I was trying to ban dog shaming and even a City employee once ask me while I was walking my dogs how I was found naked, hog tied, and left for dead with a plastic bag over my face outside of the Press Room. As far as website hosting goes, I know my personal hero Al Gore invented the internet, that my website is www.dentonforcitycouncil.com, and that the City apparently is somehow responsible for hosting this website (Al, if you are reading this, my 2020 endorsement is yours for the taking).
Q: Would you rather fight one Blalock-sized Pearson, or 3 Pearson-sized Blalocks?
A: Nancy Pearson.
Q: Tell us a secret about yourself that might negatively affect your campaign. Please keep it under 140 characters so it is convenient to Tweet and paint on an overpass.
A: Almost every voter has seen my tattoos as I have gone door to door, so I am going with me killing karaoke at D Street on a regular basis and not just during candidate karaoke events.
Q: Are you passionate about Portsmouth? Enough to literally have sex with it? Don’t think about it too long, the mechanics are confusing.
A: Ray, when someone asks you if you’re a god, you say yes.
Q: If you press this button, one random candidate you don’t support will never get on the council, but one random candidate you do support will never eat bacon again in their lifetime. Do you press the button?
A: Only if I get to be a judge again at next year’s Prescott Park Arts Festival’s 29th Chili Cook-Off (on behalf of all of this year’s judges, I would like to take this opportunity to thank the Farm for the extra cornbread you provided us .
Q What is your all time favorite conspiracy theory?
A:That I write the Tug.
Q: Finally, there’s AN historic trolley speeding down the track, coming to AN historic junction. You are standing at the historically designed switch box, dressed historically. One track leads to a set of luxury condos. On the other, a new parking garage. Do you pull the switch to save the condos, or the parking?
A: If during the 2016 election, candidate Donald Trump could stop a downtown train from hitting his limousine convoy, any of the eighteen City Council candidates can stop a historic trolley from hitting our new parking garage.